rainy days and nights...

a little something I wrote last night...

It’s a rainy Wednesday night… listening to music to try to avoid this reality that bites in every chance it gets… so many things to worry about: global warming, social conflicts, freedom of speech, money, work, responsblities, family, friends, thesis, birthdays, gifts, shoes, food, gym, Christmas, New Year… it just won’t end…

God, I just want to run away sometimes… well, most of times… Today I figured out that what I can’t control (or think I can’t) what stresses me out the most. It’s like that Radiohead song, Creep, says: “I wanna have control – I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul”. Well I do want to have control or the illusion of it at least.

About the perfect body and soul I will not talk about right now…

This season becomes one of those periods in time in which I’d love to disappear and not deal with everything’s that going on around me.

But the thing is that even if you want you can’t escape from yourself… inside it can be just as noisy, if not noisier, that in the outside… sometimes, the simple things becomes the hardest. Getting out of bed takes for ever and I’m not gonna even mention how hard it gets to work.

A few moments ago I was outside with my arms open and with my face towards the falling rain and I prayed like I hadn’t done in a while… I prayed for everything to be alright, I prayed for me to have the strength to keep going, to keep fighting, to keep believing that everything will be ok.

But it’s hard though.